The Tenth Day of Christmas Insults My Intelligence

The tenth thing at Christmas that has insulted me:

Ten breast enhancements

(Photo credit: Shira Gal)

Because the best gift you can give to your wife and her four sisters is a gift to yourself…  (Photo credit: Shira Gal)

Nine smelly reindeer

(Photo credit: Keven Law)

The weight of all nine reindeer was needed to keep those plastic surgeons in that gift box.  (Photo credit: Keven Law)

Eight vegan cookies

(Photo credit: veganchicksrock)

This must be what the hospital serves after surgery.  At least that’s how it tastes.  (Photo credit: veganchicksrock)

Seven cancelled flights

(Photo credit for original: Allen Skyy)

Eventually, the airlines will figure out a way to charge for the extra “baggage.”   (Photo credit for original: Allen Skyy)

Six sixes sixing

Because Kwanzaa, Hanukkah, and Christmas are too culturally exclusive, the local Satanist Temple has registered a new holiday: Satan’s Solstice.  Although the solstice part has some historical legitimacy, it’s just not politically correct to exclude a contemporary religious belief system from the naming convention.

And who encouraged you to buy your wife this silicone?

Five drunk fratboys

These wise young men believe that breast enhancement surgery makes an excellent gift. (Arthur Browne created this image. Art likes monkeys, probably because he claims to be a monkey. You can see more monkeys on his blog, Pouring My Art Out.)

Four weeks of church


“O come let us adore them… oops… I mean Him.”   (Thanks to James O’Neil at Memories of a Time for providing the image.  He also did the glasswork.)


Three Santas

(Photo credit: Josh Roulston)

Three out of three Santas want the lady to sit on their laps after surgery.  (Photo credit: Josh Roulston)

Two tacky gifts

(Photo credit for original: Richard Huber)

One boobjob also counts as two tacky gifts.  (Photo credit for original: Richard Huber)

And the kid who wants a large breed

(Photo credit: Steve Harris)

Unfortunately, she’s smarter than the guy who thought his wife wouldn’t kill him for buying her the boobjob.   (Photo credit: Steve Harris)

Blogger’s note: This is (obviously) a 12 part series.  All photos will have new captions in each post, so you’ll miss a lot if you only read day 12.  For all completed posts in this series, click on the “twelve days of Christmas” link below.

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