Brand Names Insult My Intelligence

I do not purchase clothing that prominently displays a brand name.  (On the other hand, I’d be tempted to wear an “I love Halliburton” t-shirt for the shock value.  But that’s another post…)  I am not a walking billboard and I am not stupid enough to pay for the privilege of becoming one.

Unfortunately, most people are not as wise as I am and I usually must remain silent about their mindless attire.

I’m not presumptuous enough to tell you that clothing should be art.  Since I’m less than wealthy, I see little point in plunking down over $100.00 for a designer shirt that will be shredded within a year or two.  (Those luxury goods aren’t always designed to last.  Rich people often care more about the latest fashions and they can afford to replace things more regularly.  In their minds, a shirt from 2012 has already gone out of style and belongs in the dumpster.)

Instead, I want my clothing to cover all of the necessary body parts and remain intact long enough to keep my bank account from crashing.   (Gender appropriateness is also important.)  Therefore: clearance racks!

And you thought this would be an advertisement for Wal-Mart…

This works for me because I’m a guy.  By contrast, women often like to accessorize with pretty things.  For example, a non-utilitarian purse.  They treat it like clothing and it has to match the outfit, so they often end up owning many purses.

I’ll leave the “battle of the sexes” content to the bloggers who do it better.  I’m more interested in the idiotic, and one particular design type stands out.  It’s the standard “look how special I am because I can afford an expensive brand” variety:

This demonstrates the owner's aesthetic excellence.  (Photo credit: )

This demonstrates the owner’s sense of aesthetic superiority. (Photo credit: prettycatty)

Let’s review.  You’re carrying around a container that holds cash, cards, and expensive electronics.  Why are you advertising to potential thieves that the contents might be especially valuable?  Of all the purses at the football game (note the obligatory transgression of gender stereotypes), yours now stands out as the most desirable to steal.  Brilliant!

Of course, your bag’s probably fake.  Just like you.

Funny how things work out…

24 thoughts on “Brand Names Insult My Intelligence

  1. If this world was not made up of mindless people, how would companies make money. They could get a car from japan that is fast, fuel efficient, great suspension, excellent service, cheap replaceable parts but they will chose to import from Europe. Even though they will have to pay for more fuel. Even if Japan makes a car as good as European brand in design, if its not that brand it wont sell. Brands are a social symbol for rich. If they dont buy the next 5-s or a new gucci bag for the next party, they will feel ashamed around their peers. Its funny how people pay for an ink worth 1000$ just to sign checks. I get some people are just brand lovers what in dont get why they buy it to impress others. Its funny some people will even take a bank loan to show their social status. My intelligence is not insulted by brand names, its insulted by mindless people .. hahaha.

  2. My problem with the brands is that I don’t want to pay for a product only to serve as a walking advertisement for the company brand.

  3. And what is your opinion of “knock-off” designer stuff. Should women just knock it off? Even if they’re cheap as dirt?

    I hate shopping and have very few accessories, except for sunglasses. I have a ton of those and that’s because I always lose them. And I cannot afford to always lose them because above all, I really hate the sun. Does that insult your intelligence?

    • Knock-off designer stuff? I see no need for it. There’s lots of quality products that don’t have to pretend to be expensive.

      As for the sunglasses, that’s not a problem. If you need them because you lose them, you need them. If I had a bunch of kids, I’d lose a lot more stuff too. 😉

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