Junk Food Insults My Intelligence

Photo Credit: Elana's Pantry

Photo Credit: Elana’s Pantry

My greatest
Junk food weakness
Is salad.

Luscious lettuce,
Tantalizing tomatoes,
Crunchy cucumbers.
Poetic Pomegranate dressing
(lowfat, luckily)

But no croutons.
They’re too fattening.

Celery will suffice.

I eat this
to indulge,
to send my soul swooning,
to beckon my inner Bugs Bunny.

But not too often,
or else…
I’ll have to call doc.

Therefore, I suffer
under a restrictive diet
of ice cream,
fried chicken,
and liverwurst.

29 thoughts on “Junk Food Insults My Intelligence

    • Oh god. Currywurst is gross. It’s a hot dog with a reddish applesauce, if I remember correctly… and curry powder.

      Or maybe the applesauce was McDonald’s curry sauce for Chicken McNuggets. Maybe currywurst was ketchup and curry powder. Regardless, gross.

      • I dunno. In Switzerland they have a sausage made with curry. It’s really good grilled. Probably not to everyone’s taste. 🙂 Some, like you, probably think it’s the…wurst! (long week, much grading)

      • I am not sure about that. We have Kalbs bratwurst in Switzerland (with veal) and Schweinsbratwurst (pork), although various butchers do their own thing. The Germans are the specialists for Wurst. Every crimi shows the detectives eating their curry wurst at the local sausage stall whilst pondering on the soluton to the case at hand. A German friend of mine said it is just a normal sausage with curry powder.

        • Well, I’ve spent a fair amount of time in that part of the world (not as much time as you…) and currywurst was one of the very few meat products I had difficulty with. I was okay with just about every cold cut and sausage and animal body part I encountered but currywurst just sat poorly with me for some reason.

          The currywurst I had was served with sauce. Maybe it varies by vendor. Everyone has their regional preference.

          And now you’ve made me miss those Swiss sausages I used to cook for myself when I was over there…

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  3. Nice twist ending. Like, twist in the colon.

    But, liverwurst is delectable–especially on crusty whole wheat slices with fresh cracked pepper, sweet red onions, lettuce, tomato, and mayo. And beer. Lots and lots of beer.

    For help furthering your junk food education, I recommend my friend Food Junk here on WordPress: https://foodjunk.wordpress.com/2014/01/03/san-quentin-state-prison-lunch-pack-a-review/

    Your food restrictions remind me of this humorous international primer:

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