Space Colonization Insults My Intelligence

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Become the citizen of the first global state of the universe!  Take a look at our promotional video and be swept away to faraway realms:

Of course, we’re required to tell you that space travel is a little more complicated than getting from one place to another.  We sometimes have to deal with a couple of minor disturbances:

Asteroids screenshot

Our rocket is the triangle-looking thing.  (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Despite such brief inconveniences, nothing more explosive can generally be expected to happen.

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Our rockets are far too monochromatic for such an occurrence to be predicted.

Our rockets are also equipped with additional legally mandated safety measures and cautionary guidance that you will find conveniently printed on the bottom of your seat cushion.  Here’s one of the many helpful hints you’ll discover:

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But then again, nothing you breathe on our rockets will even remotely compare to the unidentified flying odors (UFO’s) you inhale every day on earth.

Factory Smoke

Will you really miss earth?  (Photo credit: Miroslav Petrasko (hdrshooter.com))

You see, governments want you to believe that UFO’s don’t exist.  We want you to understand the truth because the truth will set you free.  But freedom is never free.  Our new global state of the universe threatens earthly regimes; you must not let them prevent you from exercising your right to assert your citizenship in any way you want.

Don’t just be a citizen.  Be THE citizen.

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It will be worth your money.  All you have to do is believe.

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  1. Pingback: What it Means to be an Imperfect Human | Ramisa the Authoress

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