Looking for a job is so much fun…
I contacted a nonprofit job placement agency today that could be expected to specialize in My Professional Field. I had a couple of very specific questions to ask and the response was a little lacking. My thoughts on the matter are much more interesting than anything they wrote back to me:
1- You’re telling me that you never catch wind of anything in my field? Did you read anything I wrote to you?
2- Oh, I see. You want to sell me your services. If you had read what I wrote you, you might have deduced that I have already obtained said services elsewhere for free. I’ll give you a pass on this one because I didn’t quite spell it out slowly and simply so you could understand.
3- I can forgive #’s 1 and 2 because all funds spent on your services are going to a cause I might donate to if I were employed. I remember a must-read article at PBS that talked about some horrible things LinkedIn and other job boards are doing to the unemployed. Compared to them, you’re a peach.
4- I responded to you anyway because I do need a job, but I didn’t buy any services. I doubt you’ll write back unless my reply caused you to realize that you totally botched your original message.
5- I wish I could list “dealing with idiots” as a skill on my resume. After so much job hunting, I’ve certainly earned it.